This Week In Effin' Birds: March 18, 2022

This week was chock full of shit. How much time have you got?

Just when you thought Zoom meetings couldn’t get any worse.

If a hairy black hole doesn’t explain it, I don’t know what will.

In a week with so many dumbfucks, it was hard to pick just one. But this week’s prize goes to an authenticating addict. Tip: If it sounds like a good idea on meth, it is definitely not a good idea. 

Nothing says “young hip social networking scene” like a sales pitch sliding into your DMs.

Taking over Paris Hilton’s mind and soul should be the metric by which all bullshit is henceforth measured. You know it’s bad when even Ye doesn’t believe it’s real. But in case you had any lingering doubts about the bullshit factor in play here, the bright minds at this fledgling flop spelled it out in the name of their token.

Punnyness notwithstanding, opinions diverge over the significance of this landmark.

Disrupt that family gathering with avian vulgarity — available now on the Effin’ Birds store. (For now, puzzles can only be shipped to US mailing addresses, sorry. Blame Big Puzzle for that shit.)

And as always, use the discount code JUNKMAIL to save a few bucks.